Diploma

I went down to the college today and finally picked up my diploma. It's weird, having one. It's just a piece of paper, really. It means next to nothing to me, but it's still disconcerting to actually say I have a degree in something. 17 years I've been in school, always moving through. It's just so odd to be out. Some might say high school is one out, followed by college, but it hasn't been for me. I live in the same place, with the same people, and have had much the same feeling from college as high school, save for now I have more friends and drive myself to school. It's both freeing and disturbing to think that all future learning is up to me. Finally, I can actually sit down and learn whatever I actually want to learn. Unfortunately, it also means that I don't have the structured environment that keeps me going and I can no longer blame school for not having the chance to learn what I wish. I've wanted to find the history section of the nearest library and tear through it like a madman for so long and now I have the chance to, but I'm lazy without onus keeping me more or less focused, and I despair of ever actually reading even one history book. I'll have to think of some way to motivate myself.