Brain drippings

I am ever grateful for having a livejournal as opposed to something with the word blog in it. It sounds so much better to say that I have to journal something than I have to blog. Blogging sounds like some sort of illness a logger gets. I imagine a pine tree jutting out of my chest. That, or it sounds like an euphemism for needing to go to the bathroom. "Dude, I so gotta blog right now!" Yeah...

It occurred to me this morning how amusing it is that the way to solve a problem like Maria is to marry her off. I have to wonder what other problems could so be solved or, adversely, what really wouldn't work well to do so. Billy's a problem child, let's marry him off! Jeany's got a toothache; well, let's marry her off. Johnny's got life in prison for trying to off his former wives; well... I do so love taking things to absurdity. What's really amusing is that marrying me off probably would solve some problems of mine.

My brain just died for a moment and, in the subsequent reboot, seems to have lost the rest of my thought, so I'm going to go watch cartoons. My train of thought has derailed, but, uh, something. Cartoons!

Heh

It suddenly occurred to me that the best response to the question "what are you wearing?", aside from the obvious, "nothing at all, why do you ask?" (reserved for when people can't see you, obviously), has got to be, "What aren't I wearing." Best said with a quirk of the eyebrow, even if they can't see you. Well, it's the currently the best, until I get a better idea. I suppose it's always amusing to answer questions with completely random answers. "I am wearing a halibut, thank you" might be funny too, but that could quickly degrade into some rather dirty jokes regarding placement of said halibut, so that one's best left alone. How does one even respond should someone answer with, "I'm wearing a ten-ton whale at the moment. It's rather heavy."? I'm not sure why I keep answering with aquatic animals as clothing choices.

The, "I'm wearing your MOM!" works well for the burn, I would think, but there are always more creative and better ways than that. I think "saran wrap, duct tape, and flan" would be delightfully confusing. Imagine someone getting that answer and seeing their face as they try to figure out if they really want to ask a follow-up question or not. Priceless. Of course, knowing my friends, they'd think it was stupid and ask what flan is. Still...